Sunday, December 5, 2010

There are 9 ladies dancing, and supreme court justices. It is not a coincidence.

#9- A picture of someone that has gotten you through the most.

I think it goes without saying that it is Jesus Christ, on both Day #9, and #7.

I feel that these blogs are meant to let me get to know myself better, and you get to know me better. I will not post Dan again, and once again I could talk about family, or friends, but I think I am going to share something about myself that you may not know.

Anywho so when I tend to be having hard times, and after I have resorted to Christ, and Dan there are three other people that help me forget my troubles,.


Sam (Natalie Portman) in Garden State
I have watched Garden State nearly 500 times for a reason. One, I love it. Two, it reminds me to feel. That might sound weird, but I can't think of any other way to describe it. When I am having a hard time I tend to work very hard at not having any emotion about the situation, and completely numbing myself to it. While it might be good at some times to escape feelings. Sam reminds me that there is a proper escape, and that isn't feeling nothing, "You laugh. I'm not saying I don't cry but in between I laugh and I realize how silly it is to take anything too seriously. Plus, I look forward to a good cry. It feels pretty good." Right, after this we learn that Large doesn't even remember the last time he cried. In the movie she helps Large get over his feeling of numbness(due to the constant prescription of mood related drugs), and when I watch it I cry, laugh, and most importantly feel.  


Josh Ritter
 Look at that man? Doesn't he just make you happy? He has an upbeat song that fits every feeling I could ever have. I don't know how he did it, but I could be in the dumps, and his upbeat song about being in the dumps makes me upbeat. I love listening to Josh Ritter, and I don't think there will ever be a moment or mood that he can't fit into. His lyrics are intelligent, and his music makes you want to dance.

 
This is a picture of James Dean in the movie East of Eden. It is really Samuel Hamilton in the book that gets me through things, but the choice was between the book cover or James Dean's face. I made the right choice. 

Here is a conversation between Adam and Samuel, after Adam's wife/mother of his twin boys leaves him alone, and depressed with a bullet in his shoulder. It starts with Samuel...

"I guess the last bad habit a man will give up is advising." 
"I don't want advice." 
"Nobody does. It's a giver's present. Go through the motions, Adam."
"What motions?"
"Act out being alive, like a play. And after a while, a long while, it will be true."

Adam is depressed and empty, and Samuel doesn't tell him he shouldn't feel that way. He just tells him to pretend he doesn't and eventually he won't feel it anymore. I have never gotten or gave advice like that. I have felt similar to Adam, and talked to a friend, and they do always tell you it will be better over time, but what they forget to tell you is that it won't be if you keep throwing yourself a pity party. You will feel that way forever if you just keep being sad, or at least that is how it works for me.

Samuel says plenty of other things in East of Eden that I absolutely love, but that will be all I share for now. There is so much more about these three people (two fictional) that have helped me through hard times. I have told a few people that if they want to understand how I think and feel all they have to really do is read East of Eden, watch Garden State, and listen to Josh Ritter. Something about myself has really been captured in these three different things.

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